


Next Best Thing

by AZGirl



Category: Person of Interest (TV)
Genre: Episode: s02e04 Triggerman, Gen, Introspection
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-02
Updated: 2013-03-02
Packaged: 2017-12-04 03:22:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 685
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/705952
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AZGirl/pseuds/AZGirl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Harold is the next best thing to ever happen to him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Next Best Thing

**Author's Note:**

> My muse has been keeping mostly quiet recently due to things going on in my real life, so this is my first completed fic in several months. I actually started this just after the first U.S. airing of Triggerman; watching the recent repeat of it made me determined to finish this.

**ooooooo**

Having successfully finished up with our most recent Number late last night or very early this morning (depending on how you look at it), Finch suggested I get some rest while I could and come into the Library later than was my normal. Unfortunately, no matter how much I needed the sleep, habits are difficult to break and I was awake at my usual time. Making sure to keep as much out of the direct line of sight of any potential threats from outside as possible (another habit), I sat in a comfortable chair by the window enjoying a cup of freshly brewed coffee. 

While watching the world go by down below and fighting the urge to go to the Library, my thoughts drift once again towards Annie and the man who sacrificed his life for her – Riley Cavanaugh. 

It’s easy for me to see the parallels between our two lives, and I wonder if my end will be like Riley’s – alone and protecting something I care about. 

“ _She’s the best thing to ever happen to me and I will do whatever I gotta do to save her._ ” 

Riley protected Annie not just because he loved her, but because she helped Riley see that he could be more than the thug and killer he’d been for most of his life. I protect Harold not just because he’s my employer and friend, but because he helped me see that my life didn’t have to be over. The CIA had betrayed me and Jess was gone, but I could once again have a purpose. I am determined to do whatever it takes to protect my purpose and keep Harold (and The Machine) from harm. 

Many would think that Finch is the best thing to ever happen to me, but he’s not. No, that honor belongs to Jessica. _She_ was the best thing to happen to me. 

My time with Jessica was the happiest of my life. It was the first and last time I remember truly being that content and happy. When I was with her, I was the good man she thought I was and not the killer I was trained to be. I had never felt more alive or more human, and will always regret my decision to leave Jessica behind. So my friend may not be _the_ best thing, he certainly is the _next best_ , the second best thing to ever happen to me. 

I used to think that being in the Army was the second best, since I was helping to keep my country safe, but then the CIA got their claws into me. One joint mission with them and I was hooked on the idea of hunting and destroying Evil at its source rather than wasting resources fighting its ground troops.  Eventually, as I was dragged further and further from who I used to be, having been in Special Forces became the worst thing simply because my work with them lead to my recruitment with the CIA. Working for them, it had become increasingly difficult to determine if we were doing any real good or who my real enemies were. I had lost my way and become someone devoid of most emotions, someone who only cared about the next mission. 

Even though what Harold and I do will likely get me killed sooner rather than later, without Finch, I am certain that I would be dead already. He found me at a time when I was considering being as dead as everyone else thought I was. He made me believe that I could change. Just like Annie had done for Riley, Finch had pulled me back from the edge and gave me the courage and strength to be a better man. 

I wake up every day with two goals in mind – to fulfill my purpose and to be a better man. Every day, I give everything I have within me to not fail in my endeavor. I may have failed the best thing to ever happen to me, but I absolutely refuse to fail the next best. 

**ooooooo**

_The end._

**ooooooo**

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted on fanfiction.net on March 2, 2013. (No beta for this one.)
> 
> Thanks for reading!


End file.
